GYPSY TOO…
2 of 2.
this is for you.
i shouldn’t have ran away from you
but that’s what that pride mixed with fear can do
but didn’t you run away from me too?
out of fear that i am still what’s best for you?
after all these years
of separation
i grew into desperation
of being understood
and it led me into hearts of other women
and they still couldn’t do what you could
you protected me from myself
and i owe you credit for that
you loved me when it was clearly out of grasp
i’ll always cherish and respect you for that fact
how many years are we into this shit?
that doesn’t matter ‘cause we have a lifetime to go
i made you a promise that we’ll be best-friends forever
i’ll follow you wherever you go
this is for that part of me.
that was bigger than life itself
that had me giving myself out relentlessly until there was nothing left
not one ounce of
love
joy
or strength
for the lover i would’ve given my life for
that had me hellbent.
you sent me.
i dove deep into your pain
as if it were the heart of the streets
i would’ve taken the battery out of my heart
so yours would keep a steady beat
any demon that faced you with me on your side
immediately knew defeat
there was not one battle you would win without me
how dynamic is that?
you let me love you until your damage threw us off track.
derailing.
you deranged me.
you changed me.
but i’ll still love you forever
this shit is crazy.
the passion
the pain
the scars
the trauma
they’re all still there
i’m running
i’m racing
i’m pacing
trying to outrun you
and i’m out of time to spare
i have no choice but to keep running to my death
and that’s unfair.
where’s my savior in my time of despair?
weren’t we a pair?
or were we just damaged souls
that were aged already when we met?
we had no chance of growing old in this heartless cold.
giving up now is something i can’t move past to regret.
this is for the heart of me
that captured my soul
effortlessly
you did exactly what was needed to be done
to rescue me...
are you my destiny?
you are the only one i know for certain that i will always want next to me
you comforted me
caressed me in ways i’d never be able to imagine
you were supposed to be my new chapter in this love shit
but your past happened...
i won’t argue with you for following your heart
but what about the heart that you healed and tore
right back apart?
you convinced me of my own worth
when they stripped it from me
i went to pick up those broken pieces from my mirror
and they all left deep cuts, as you can see...
but you?
you aided me when i never asked you to
you seen the rain clouds posted up above me
and prophesied blue
and a vibrant yellow sun i’d never be able to fathom
without the scales being removed from my eyes...
you were the woman i was meant to be with in the meantime.
do you believe time?
the audacity of that bitch that said she was on our side
how could i ever believe in such facades
that causes worlds to collide
and crash
and burn
into nothingness?
when all i wanted to do was give you my love before it withered away to nothingness...
i’ve had enough of this.
i’ll never be able to outrun my truth
but these lies would be a little less more convincing to believe without you.